Monday, June 29, 2009

No Attachments

Lost my Focus when I was 10
Daddy took the stability when he left
A couple of visits, phone calls and cash was my fatherly figure
Reading poetry beyond my years was his way of showing that his child was smart
Went to his house 5 times since he left
Still don't know his house number
And that's all it was for 6 years
No quality time
Just show-off time

Called me an idiot when I didn't make NHS
Made me work harder, smarter and worrisome 'til I did
Then college became a money factor when he realized that I wasn't the only smart girl in the world
My major...stupid
My school...too much
Staying on campus...what for?
All the crazy things he's said to keep his money from me were ignored 'cause I wanted a Daddy, not a pocketbook

Asking for money for anything seemed like pulling teeth
Headaches and nightmares and crying sessions became the norm
Grown ass into one of the best schools in the nation, but that didn't matter
It's not the field of his choice and not in his price range, so I'm screwed
That pissed me off

I finally decided to say "F*ck You" and choose the school and major of my liking
Imma perfect my work and party my ass off and it's nothing you can do about it 'cause I'm not letting you contribute to sh*t

Never thought my Dad would be a hater...but I gotta grow up, sometime
He was never Daddy, just him
And that's fine with me


For a song that relates to this topic, download "Anymore" by Emmy Rossum, and follow her on Twitter: @emmyrossum

"I will not let you define everything I am by one thing that I don't have...'cause I'm more than that. ...I will not be ashamed of my name, anymore." :-)

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